Super Street Fighter IV - As seen by a 3½ year old girl

And now for something completely different: my top ten moments that came from playing Super Street Fighter IV with my 3½ year old daughter.

1. On Blanka

"He's Pascal. He's green and orange."
She, like many girls her age, is obsessed with the movie Tangled, so this wasn't surprising.

2. On Dhalsim

"He's different. The girls are better than him."

Better... why? I don't know. But speaking of the girls....

3. On C. Viper

"She kind of looks like a doctor, with those X's in her ears."
I don't follow her logic, but she proceeded to call C. Viper 'The Doctor' every time she saw her.

4. On C. Viper's ultra combo, Burst Time

"...I could do that."

She then spun around in circles in front of the Xbox, which she seemed to think was a successful attempt.

5. On Dee Jay

"He's a baninja! He has baninja things on him!"

...Yeah, I don't know what a 'baninja' is, or what he's wearing that qualifies as a 'baninja thing'.

6. On Chun-Li's vocalizations

"She said something! 'Hergoken!' She don't know what she said."
Glass houses. That's all I'm going to say.

7. On M. Bison

"Why is he showing his pink thing to us?"
I tried to tell her it was Psycho Power. She refused to listen.

8. On Hakan and his oil shower

"Is that gross, Dad?"

As far as you're concerned, yes, it is. Despite this comment, Hakan was her favorite character, hands down.

9. On Sagat

"He's a pirate. He might win, with that mustache."

...Pretty sure she meant to say eye patch.

10. On Dudley

"He looks like a baker! But our baker doesn't have a mustache...."
...She completely lost me here. We don't even have a baker.

Dragon Age Inquisition Playthrough - The End

Torquemada finds herself in the war room once again, along with Morrigan, Leliana, Cullen and Josephine. Morrigan tells us that with the help of the voices in her head, she should be able to take down Corypheus' pet dragon all by herself. That will leave us to deal with Corypheus himself and Torquemada says she'll be more than happy to fight him personally. There's just one problem: we still have to find these two big targets before we can actually attack them. Our advisers begin suggesting their usual tactics (send soldiers, send scouts, send diplomats) when the conversation is interrupted by a flash of green light that floods through the windows and causes Torquemada's mark to start pulsing with energy. Everyone in the room understands the significance immediately. Corypheus has opened the breach in the Valley of Sacred Ashes once again.

Damn it, Josephine! I told you I didn't want to invest in those giant green neon signs to attract merchants!

Cullen tells us that not all of our forces have returned to Skyhold from the Arbor Wilds yet, and Torquemada replies that this is probably the reason why Corypheus didn't wait to act. She and Morrigan agree, however, that we can't wait for reinforcements and we need to confront Corypheus before he tears open the Veil. With that, we tell Cassandra, Varric and Vivienne to come with us as we head back to Haven to deal with the breach one more time. Inquisition soldiers who stayed behind to guard Haven are already confronting Corypheus and being slaughtered by the time the party gets there. The overblown, would-be-God darkspawn notices Torquemada immediately as she arrives on the scene and tells her she shouldn't be too confident with her previous victories. Then he has his pet dragon land nearby to threaten us. We've already prepared for that, though.

Seriously, why should I be scared of your dragon this late in the game?
Torquemada is literally wearing the scales of its slain relatives right now.

Morrigan is a shapeshifter and has learned one of Flemeth's greatest secrets: how to take the form of a dragon. You could say that Corypheus was a bit annoyed when a dragon of our own showed up to perform a mid-air tackle on his favorite minion. It also leaves him with no choice but to start fighting us himself. Corypheus is similar in many ways to an arcane horror in the sense that he likes to keep his distance, casts powerful spells from afar, and possesses a surprisingly high amount of hit points given the fact that he's a mage. Also, like his dragon friend, he likes to retreat to the inaccessible balconies of the ruined Temple of Sacred Ashes so Torquemada and Cassandra can't get their powerful attacks in. Too bad for him that we powered up Bianca (Varric's crossbow, in case you forgot) with some arms made out of dragon bone. Varric's bolts hit hard enough to convince Corypheus that maybe it's a bad idea to be such a tempting target for our dwarf.

After taking off enough of Corypheus' health, we cut to Morrigan in her dragon form, still locked in battle with Corypheus' dragon. She hasn't had much time to practice being a dragon, unfortunately, so things aren't going so well for her. With her strength waning, she decides to do as much damage as possible to her opponent with her final attack. She soars high into the sky with the dragon chasing her, then suddenly reverses direction and locks talons with it on her way down. She maintains her grip as the two dragons slam into the ground and further ruin the already ruined temple. Morrigan shifts back into her human form, her energies spent, and promptly collapses. Torquemada and her party rush to the location where Corypheus' dragon crash landed and find it weakened, but still alive. Knowing that we can't kill Corypheus until the dragon is dead, our fight with him is put on hold as we finish what Morrigan started.

Last minute plot twist! We're not only the Inquisitor, we're also the Dovahkiin!

This dragon has more hit points than any other dragon we've faced... but about two thirds of them have been knocked off by Morrigan. So, despite the fact that it has corrupted red lyrium breath and the ability to cast armor spells on itself frequently, this dragon fight isn't going to be any more challenging than the previous ones. Torquemada has the enhanced version of a rogue skill called Shadow Strike, plus a ring that further enhances this ability's effectiveness, which leads to a dragon-slaying technique that basically boils down to furiously punching the beast in the tail until it dies. Inevitably, the dragon falls to this unorthodox assault and begins glowing with magical energy as it dies. At first, I thought Torquemada was going to absorb its soul, but then I remembered that this isn't Skyrim. The energy is transferred into Corypheus instead, rejuvenating the health he lost in our first exchange. Seeing his pet defeated, he decides to retreat to the location where his breach-tearing spell is working its magic in order to sunder the Veil before we take advantage of his mortality.

Corypheus has nothing new to offer in round two of our fight. He jumps around more than he did last time and uses more damaging laser light shows to keep us at bay, but he's facing four people who just shrugged off a dragon fight. His final tactic is to pour as much of his energy into the breach as possible in a desperate attempt to achieve his goal before he dies. He doesn't even bother to attack at this point, which only serves to open him up to Torquemada's deadly flanking bonuses. After a Hidden Blades attack, a Shadow Strike and the aptly-named Deathblow ability, Corypheus has taken too much damage to continue his ritual. He falls to his knees and begs his ancient gods for assistance, while Torquemada channels the energy from her mark into the ancient elven orb Corypheus has been using to focus his magic. She brings it under her control, robbing Corypheus of his ability to manipulate the fabric of reality. Then, she decides to be nice and grants Corypheus' wish... and banishes him to the Fade, where he can no longer do any damage. Last but certainly not least, Torquemada uses the power of the orb to close the breach, resulting in a predictable magical explosion.

"You wanted into the Fade? Allow me to give you a HAND with that!"

The first of Torquemada's companions to find her after the battle is, surprisingly, Solas. He doesn't seem overly concerned with her well-being, though. He looks down at the orb that she just used and sees that it broke under the strain that it was subjected to. Torquemada sits up from the ground as he laments the artifact's destruction and reassures him that Corypheus will never be able to abuse it again. Solas replies that Corypheus may have been stopped, but so much has been lost. At that point, Torquemada's other companions approach and we see that while Morrigan is still greatly wounded from the battle, she'll survive. Cassandra, seeing that the Inquisition's primary mission has been accomplished, asks the obvious question: what now? Torquemada scans the battlefield, as if in disbelief that her enemies have truly been vanquished. As she does so, she notices that Solas has disappeared. Regardless, she turns back to Cassandra and says we're going back to Skyhold.

Pictured: not actually Torquemada's admirers, but a roving band of masonry enthusiasts.

Torquemada and her entourage are greeted with celebration by the residents of Skyhold, and the triumphant Inquisitor takes a moment to bask in their adulation alongside Cullen, Leliana and Josephine. We then move to the main hall, where a banquet has been prepared. Leliana tells us before we enter that her scouts have found no trace of Solas and Torquemada can't understand why he would leave over a broken orb. Still, the rest of our companions are waiting inside and the banquet serves as a final opportunity to chat with them before the end of the game. Cassandra says she plans to restore the Seekers of Truth and make them respectable again. Varric plans to go back to the Free Marches eventually, and maybe write a book about his time with the Inquisition. Vivienne and Dorian say they'll return to Orlais and Tevinter, respectively, probably sooner rather than later. Iron Bull, Cole and Sera are content to stay with the Inquisition because it's been fun. As for Thom Rainier (not Blackwall)... who cares what that miserable fraud has to say?

They all just stare at you as you exit. It's always awkward when you're the first person to leave a party.
...And yes, I'm speaking from personal experience, there.

We eventually retire to our quarters and the game ends with a scene that's a little too symbolic for my liking. Torquemada, looking out from her balcony over the Frostback Mountains, as the sun rises over a new day in Thedas. Kind of making a point with a two-handed maul, there. Anyway, this is followed by a series of portraits and a narration by Morrigan that tells you about the events in Thedas following your Inquisitor's victory. In my case, Empress Celene has a flimsy hold over Orlais as Briala has been very effective in plotting against her in exile. The Grey Wardens in Thedas have elected to be less reclusive champions of the people, but that has made their leaders in distant Weisshaupt angry, apparently... news from Grey Warden headquarters stops reaching Thedas, including news of Hawke, who was last seen heading to Weisshaupt. A new Divine is finally chosen: Leliana, who immediately makes drastic reforms including freeing the mages and opening the priesthood to members of all races. The mages use their newfound freedom to break ties with the Inquisition and form a new organization, which finds respect that the old Circles lacked. As for Morrigan, she leaves with Kieran and adds that while the Inquisitor is a revered symbol of hope and change to many, she remains a target to others.

Under Leliana's rule as Divine Victoria, nugs were declared sacred by the Chantry.
Hundreds of dwarven nug farmers were subsequently immolated by the faithful. Progress!

And that, for the most part, is the end of Dragon Age Inquisition... however, there's one final scene after the credits. We catch up with Solas, who is walking through a wooded area and talking to an unseen person, once again lamenting the destruction of the orb. The other person in the woods is revealed to be Flemeth. She tells him that he should not have given his orb to Corypheus, and addresses him as "Dread Wolf". In Dalish lore, the Dread Wolf is a god-like being who was supposedly responsible for the death of Mythal. The Dread Wolf, in the form of Solas, and Mythal, in the form of Flemeth, tell each other that they regret that things have happened this way. They embrace... and Solas kills Flemeth. Her body appears to turn to stone and Solas' eyes glow with energy, suggesting that he has taken at least one soul from Flemeth. Then, the scene ends.

As far as I'm concerned, whoever decided that scene was a good idea made a huge mistake.

No, Solas, the people don't need you. They need Flemeth.

I spent most of the game ignoring you and wondering when she would show up.

I made a tongue-in-cheek remark about how Flemeth set herself up as a recurring antagonist in Dragon Age Inquisition but the fact is, she really did as soon as she outplayed Morrigan and took the soul of the Old God from Kieran. Additionally, Morrigan had unwittingly accepted power that would cause her to be bound to the will of her mother, which is the exact opposite of what she wanted. Last but certainly not least, Flemeth has been voice acted brilliantly by Kate Mulgrew for the past three games. This character was one of the best things the Dragon Age series had going for it and they have apparently thrown that away by letting her get killed by a deadpan, aloof elf that we've only just met in Inquisition. The writers shot themselves in the foot here. Unless it turns out that Flemeth has possessed Solas the same way she possessed her daughters, this plot development was just plain stupid.

Not the best scene to end on, but there it is: the end of my playthrough for Dragon Age Inquisition! This completes the trilogy thus far, and although Inquisition includes a multiplayer mode, it's not something I'm going to go in-depth with. Not only does the multiplayer not add to the story, but it's also simply no fun to play. The lack of a healing class and a strict restriction on healing potions means that the scenarios are designed to be unwinnable at level one, and after your defeat the game will direct you to the microtransactions in the cash shop to power up your character. It's nothing short of insulting. Regardless, I enjoyed the single-player experience of Inquisition and I think the game is an improvement over some of the shortcomings Dragon Age 2 had. I may or may not do a more in-depth review in the future.

For now, I'm going to start considering other options for playthroughs. Feel free to leave a comment if there's anything you'd like to see!

Dragon Age Inquisition Playthrough - A Soul Stealing Interlude

This is a post about Morrigan and Flemeth's storyline in Dragon Age Inquisition, and it contains some big spoilers about these characters. I know the game's been out a while now but the mystery surrounding Flemeth is one of the most interesting parts of the series, and there may be some of you who want to keep the revelations a surprise. So, there's your fair warning. For the rest of you, let's start by recapping these characters' histories from the previous playthroughs:

Funny, I don't remember Flemeth turning into a skeleton with a book for legs.

In Dragon Age: Origins, Flemeth saved Amastacia and Alistair from dying in the Battle of Ostagar and told her daughter Morrigan to travel with them to build an army using the Grey Warden treaties. During their attempt to use one such treaty with the circle mages of Lake Calenhad, Amastacia carelessly ransacked the First Enchanter's office and handed a musty tome he found to Morrigan, since he thought it was kinda icky. It turned out to be Flemeth's grimoire and within its pages, Morrigan discovered that her mother had been prolonging her life for countless generations by possessing the bodies of her daughters. Knowing that she was next to be possessed, Morrigan asked Amastacia to kill Flemeth, which the dwarf managed to accomplish in a failed attempt to backstab Morrigan. This should have been the end of Flemeth....

However, unbeknownst to Morrigan or Amastacia, Flemeth had already come to the aid of the Hawke family by then, during their escape from the darkspawn invasion of Lothering. In exchange for securing their safe passage to Kirkwall, Flemeth made Chickene Hawke promise to deliver an amulet to the Dalish elf tribe living near Sundermount in the Free Marches. This amulet contained a piece of her soul, and when Merrill performed the appropriate ritual, she regained her physical form about a year after her "death" at Amastacia's hands. Meanwhile, Morrigan asked Amastacia to share her bed on the night before his battle with the Archdemon in Denerim and Amastacia leapt at the opportunity without listening to the reason why. That reason: when the Archdemon was killed, the soul of the Old God it possessed was transferred to the baby that Morrigan just made with Amastacia. When Morrigan comes to Skyhold in Dragon Age Inquisition, we see that baby is now a 10 year old boy named Kieran, and he has some odd mannerisms.

He's also unusually sensitive to bloom lighting.
It's a serious allergy, affecting thousands of video game characters every year....

We've now reached the point in the story where Morrigan has absorbed the power of the Well of Sorrows and has asked to speak to Torquemada in the garden to discuss plans for the final confrontation with Corypheus. Once we arrive there, we don't find her in her usual spot by the gazebo, though. So, we check in the eluvian room and are surprised to find that the mirror has been activated and Leliana is standing next to it. She tells us that she found Morrigan in a nearly panicked state, which is weird because she usually shows no feelings other than disdain, and all she said before she ran through the eluvian was that Kieran was responsible. Leliana suggests that we follow Morrigan through the eluvian while she gets some mages to back us up. For better or worse, Torquemada now has a great deal of experience in other dimensions, so she doesn't hesitate to step through the portal once again.

We find ourselves not in the ethereal gateway between eluvians, but in the Fade itself... which shouldn't be possible. We find Morrigan almost immediately, who seems genuinely distraught and says Kieran shouldn't have been able to activate the eluvian at all, let alone use it as a portal to the Fade. She has no idea where he could have gone and since the Fade is infinite, he could literally be anywhere. We remind Morrigan that we're a video game protagonist and all she needs to do is follow us to the quest marker. She scowls at us, but she's not ready to give up looking regardless so we start searching the Fade together.

Flemeth, you wicked creature. You had better not be giving Kieran any fashion advice.

Sure enough, we find Kieran but he's not alone. An old woman with yellow eyes, white hair and an outfit that screams "villainess" is kneeling beside him and Morrigan angrily addresses her as "Mother." Torquemada is confused, but Flemeth confirms that she's the boy's grandmother and she helped him open the portal to the Fade. This leaves plenty of questions unanswered, but Morrigan explains that Flemeth possesses her offspring to extend her life and is no doubt looking to possess Kieran now. Flemeth coolly replies that Morrigan took an ancient power for herself just as she took an ancient power for herself, so Morrigan is in no position to judge. She elaborates by saying that Morrigan hid Kieran from her well until now, but when she took the power of the Well of Sorrows it allowed Flemeth to find him.

This is when we learn how Flemeth became such a powerful witch in the first place: she didn't make a deal with just some Fade spirit. She made contact with what was left of the elven goddess Mythal herself and Mythal remains a part of her. Torquemada and Morrigan say that's impossible but Flemeth tells her daughter to ask the new voices in her head. Morrigan reluctantly says that the voices tell her it's true. Torquemada's still not sure she believes that, but turns her attention to the immediate matter at hand and asks Flemeth what exactly she wants. Flemeth replies that she only came for one thing and Kieran tells Morrigan he has to go with her now.

One dialogue option here is, "how can you be an elven goddess? You're not an elf!"
...If that's your biggest concern at this moment in the game, you have some funny priorities.

Morrigan angrily tells Flemeth that there's no way she's letting him go with her. She admits that at first her interest was in the soul of the Old God but now Kieran is simply her son. Flemeth tells her that she might allow her to leave with Kieran but promises that if she does, Morrigan's life will be under constant danger. One way or the other, Flemeth will find a way to settle the score. Morrigan replies that she doesn't care. Flemeth can possess her right now if she wants but she refuses to be the kind of mother to Kieran that Flemeth was to her. Flemeth thinks for a moment, then kneels down beside Kieran again.

A wave of blue energy washes over Flemeth and Kieran. Kieran asks his grandmother if this means the dreams will stop and she says they will. Kieran thanks her and goes back to his mother. Flemeth tells Morrigan that a soul cannot be forced on the unwilling, then departs. What this means is that Flemeth just took the soul of the Old God that Kieran was carrying, and he's pretty much a normal boy now. It's entirely possible that this was Flemeth's end goal throughout the entire series thus far, but what she plans to do with the Old God soul now that she has it, we have no idea. Regardless, Torquemada, Morrigan and Kieran all return safely to Skyhold after that. Morrigan is happy to have her son back safely, but she laments the fact that he was supposed to have an important destiny and that's now in Flemeth's hands. Also, she balked at the fact that taking the power of the Well of Sorrows would bind her to the will of Mythal, and she now realizes that this essentially binds her to her mother's will.

Morrigan, it's obvious. Her plan is to cement her status as badass recurring villain for future Dragon Age games.

As far as I know, this is the last we hear about these three characters' stories in Inquisition, but it's a nice conclusion to the conflict that was set up between Morrigan and Flemeth in the previous two games. This does raise some new questions and I feel like the explanation of "Flemeth is Mythal" kind of comes out of nowhere, but I can't complain too much. I know I would have been disappointed if Morrigan returned for Inquisition but Flemeth didn't make an appearance, too. Really, I'm just glad that the writers gave these characters their moment in this game and didn't save the content for DLC or something. Anyway, the next update should be the end game so join me then to find out how Torquemada's story concludes!

Dragon Age Inquisition Playthrough - All's Well That Ends Well

After a brief hiatus, due to the fact that I'm not the only person in my house who wants to play this game, we're picking up where we left off with Torquemada: getting ready to head into the Arbor Wilds and bring the fight to Corypheus. Morrigan spells out the situation for our advisers, and it doesn't look good. If Corypheus finds an eluvian, he will be able to use it to enter the Fade and once there, he will obtain either godhood or a new army of nasty things to fight for him. In addition, Morrigan believes that he has not found just any ruin, but the Temple of Mythal itself. While this means little to Josephine, Cullen and Leliana, Torquemada is a Dalish elf and knows this to be the name of the goddess that the ancient elves worshiped prior to being mostly conquered by humans. There's a good chance that Corypheus will find more ancient elven magic there than just the eluvian, and he has a significant head start on finding said treasures.

Nah, we're fine, Josephine. I double-checked the achievement list and this isn't the endgame quest yet.

Our advisers dicker a little over whether it would be best to march our army into the Wilds or wait for our allies to assemble so our combined forces can march together. They also can't agree on whether or not Leliana's spies should head into the Wilds ahead of everyone else since they'll be slaughtered if discovered without backup. Torquemada decides that everyone's moving out as quickly as possible... the spies go in, backed by whatever forces can be mustered immediately, and allies will join when they can. Josephine writes some polite letters, Leliana sends some birdies out and Cullen poses heroically atop battlements as troops march below him. One montage later, we find ourselves in the Arbor Wilds and are surprised to discover that Empress Celene herself has arrived on the battlefield, much to Josephine's annoyance. The Empress insists, however, that she wants to present when the Inquisition crushes the Red Templars and that's why she has arrived with Val Royeaux palace guards in tow. Knowing that Corypheus has a pet dragon, we tell her to be ready to move out at a moment's notice, then head down the path leading into the Wilds to start crushing Red Templars to please the Empress.

Corypheus really has pulled out as many of his remaining forces as he can for this push through the Wilds, as we discover when we find the last of his enthralled Grey Wardens holding a position in a river crossing along the path. There are plenty of Red Templars in various stages of red lyrium corruption, but the Empress wasn't lying about Orlais' desire to participate in the fighting and her elite guards make defeating them much easier. Torquemada just has to sneak up behind a distracted Templar and unleash her increasingly deadly assassin skills to bring a given melee to a sudden conclusion. The only difficulty we experience is when some aggressive, decidedly non-Dalish elves try attacking us as well. Torquemada's curious about who they are and what they're doing here, but it's a mystery that will have to wait. It's not long before we reach a cliff overlooking the approach to the elven ruin, where we see Corypheus himself, flanked by Samson and his favorite Red Templar buddies, engaged in a fight with some more elves.

"Note that I didn't say WHOSE death. Clever, huh? That's why I deserve to be a god and not you."

One elf, wielding a mage's staff and plenty of power to back it up, is retreating to the safety of a large, glowing magical stone as Corypheus approaches. The stone seems to be generating a barrier to keep him and his Red Templars out of the temple but Corypheus appears unconcerned, telling the elf that he will not be denied the power of the Well of Sorrows. He steps forward, getting lashed by the stone's energies and the mage's spells in the process, and destroys the stone in a huge magical explosion. The barrier goes down, but all that's left of Corypheus is a puddle of black goop. The elves retreat into the temple as the Red Templars charge after them, and Torquemada and her companions head down to survey the scene. Morrigan has no idea what this "Well of Sorrows" is and doesn't like the fact that she was apparently wrong about the eluvian. We don't have much time to discuss it, though. One of Corypheus' corrupted Grey Wardens, who was laying wounded on the ground after the battle, is consumed by the black goop and a new Corypheus bursts out of his body. The dragon shows up at this point as well, so Torquemada tells everyone to make a run for the temple and we close the doors behind us in order to hide from the incoming fire breath.

Corypheus has been delayed, but the ancient elven temple that stretches before us is full of Red Templars. We fight our way forwards until we eventually catch up with Samson again. He's not in a fighting mood though, and jumps through a hole in the floor of the temple along with a small group of Red Templars while leaving us to deal with some mutants. After dealing with them, Cassandra wants to pursue Samson directly but Morrigan has another idea: by completing the rituals symbolizing the "Pilgrim's Path" to the Temple of Mythal, we should be able to open a door that takes us closer to the Well of Sorrows. Cassandra says that stopping Samson is our objective, not reaching the well, and Vivienne says she doesn't trust Morrigan, either. Morrigan takes us aside and admits that she wants to reach the Well of Sorrows because she believes relics of the past must be preserved no matter the cost. She also points out that Corypheus wants this power and that's all the reason we should need to want to get it before he does. Torquemada doesn't trust Morrigan either, but she's too curious about her people's past to pass up this opportunity. We head for the ritual chambers.

"All I want is to absorb some ancient power without having to do something icky with a dwarf. Is that unreasonable?"

Now, at first, the Pilgrim's Path appear to be simple tile-based puzzles that require you to walk a path that has you step only once on each tile. One of these is straightforward and not too frustrating to figure out. However... it's impossible to tell exactly how many tiles are part of the other two puzzles at first glance. One has a lever that controls gates, which shut you out of tiles you need to walk on, and the second is divided by a half-wall that may or may not reset the puzzle if you jump over it. Initially, I assumed that I could use multiple party members to complete different sections of these puzzles but that's not the solution the designers were looking for. These are the bad kinds of puzzles in video games: the poorly-explained ones with fake difficulty thrown in. Also, taking Morrigan's suggestion gets you disapproval from Vivienne and Cassandra. Regardless, after some frustrating walking, a new door opens and we proceed into the inner sanctum.

Upon entering, five elves appear behind us with bows drawn while the apparent leader of the elves, who was blasting Corypheus with magic earlier, walks out onto a balcony above us. He introduces himself as Abelas and calls his group the sentinel elves, the guardians of the Temple of Mythal. Abelas assumes we're here to take the power of the Well of Sorrows and asks us why we've been fighting with the Red Templars. Torquemada tells him that the Red Templars are our mutual enemies and we're just here to stop their leader. She also tells him that she knows this place is sacred and she's tried to respect that as best she can, as a member of his people. Abelas replies that the Dalish are not his people, and we barged in uninvited just like any human would have. However, he recognizes that the Red Templars are a larger threat and if we're truly uninterested in the Well of Sorrows, he'll give us the chance to prove it. A sentinel elf will guide us through the temple to get ahead of Samson and after we defeat him, the sentinel elves will guide us out of the Wilds on the condition that we never return. Torquemada accepts, but Morrigan does not. She transforms into a bird and flies past Abelas, hoping to reach the Well before anyone else.

This offer isn't that generous, considering that the sentinel elves are already killing Red Templars in an adjoining room.

Thankfully, the rest of the sentinel elves are unperturbed by Morrigan's actions and the guide appears to take us through the temple. Using a series of secret doors to move through side passages, the guide takes us around the rooms where Red Templars are fighting sentinel elves and we eventually reach a chamber just outside of the Well of Sorrows. After cutting through some Red Templars to reach the door leading outside, we enter a courtyard where Samson and four of his fellows are casually walking towards the Well. He's annoyed that we followed him this far and boasts that Corypheus has chosen him to be the vessel for the Well's power. We point out that Corypheus only wants to use him and cast him aside but he scoffs at our attempt to play Commander Shepard and convince him to redeem himself. He channels the energy of the red lyrium within himself and attacks along with his personal guard. Samson is a heavy hitter, but he can only really focus on one of us at a time and that gives Torquemada plenty of opportunities to get behind him and use her skills that take advantage of flanking bonuses. The same tactics we used to furiously punch dragons in their tails until they die also work on Samson, but Cassandra notes that he's still breathing when the fight is over, and could be taken to Skyhold to face judgement.

The Red Templars are down, but there's a commotion at the Well of Sorrows ahead of us. Sure enough, Morrigan and Abelas have arrived and Abelas is prepared to destroy the Well to ensure that no one can abuse its power. Morrigan reminds Torquemada that he'll destroy elven history and Abelas insists that he's trying to keep his people's legacy intact. By his own admission, however, the Dalish are not his people so Torquemada tells him that everything the ancient elves once were is already gone. Even Mythal herself is believed to be dead. Abelas is forced to admit that their sacred mission has become pointless and we are free to do as we wish, but warns us that using the Well comes at a price. The Well of Sorrows contains the knowledge, wisdom and willpower of generations of priests of Mythal and taking their power binds us to the will of Mythal. Morrigan scoffs at being bound to the will of a dead goddess, but Torquemada thinks she shouldn't be so sure because the priests themselves have a will of their own. One thing's for sure, though: Abelas has given up on defending the Well and if we don't take its power, Corypheus will. Since Torquemada has no intention of binding herself to the power of the Well and Morrigan is still so eager, we decide to let her wade into its waters.

Morrigan, wait! I translated this ancient elven writing. It says: "No lifeguard on duty." Just thought you should know.

The energies flow around Morrigan, there is a burst of magic and when it dissipates, the Well of Sorrows is empty. We check on Morrigan, who babbles in elven a little but quickly regains her focus. She has gained the power of voices in her head and the ancient priests of Mythal are already imparting their knowledge to her. The first piece of info she learns is that there is, in fact, an eluvian located conveniently near the Well which Morrigan can activate now that she has absorbed this new power. This is about to come in handy because Corypheus has finally caught up to us. He sees that the Well is empty and is enraged, literally flying toward us to attack. Torquemada tells Morrigan to go ahead and prove she can activate the eluvian and she does so, allowing us to escape through the magic mirror portal. Corypheus' progress is impeded by what looks like a water elemental, and Morrigan closes the portal behind us before he can follow. Moments later, we reappear, stepping through the eluvian located in Skyhold near our garden.

As usual, we head to the war table for a debrief with our advisers. Cullen reports that we won the battle of course, but he does not know where Corypheus and his dragon have fled. They left the Arbor Wilds as soon as we escaped through the eluvian, effectively leaving his army to die by the swords of the Inquisition. Leliana is more concerned by the fact that Corypheus has demonstrated that he can be reborn in a new body when he dies, even the body of a Grey Warden. Morrigan says that she's been listening to the voices in her head and has learned a crucial secret about Corypheus, though. His dragon is not really an archdemon, it's a dragon that he has put part of his power into. If we can kill the dragon, it will eliminate his ability to be reborn in a new body. Torquemada asks her if the dragon is like a horcrux and Morrigan tells us to shut up, because we're not allowed to call it that. What matters is, we have a new impossible task before us: find Corypheus' dragon and manage to kill it right under its masters' nose. This task also promises to be "the final confrontation".

Sooo, now we're taking tactical advice from the witch who admits to hearing voices in her head?
I have to imagine that at this moment, Cullen is just outside of frame... drinking heavily.

So, the next major update is probably going to be the end game! I am planning a mini-update before then, however, because Morrigan has an interesting scene following the end of the Arbor Wilds quest. Said update will contain some fairly major spoilers regarding Morrigan, her son and her mother. That's why I'm keeping it separate, just in case you care about that sort of thing. Anyway, I promise we'll get through this without another one month break!

Dragon Age Inquisition Playthrough - Now With More Dragon, Less Age

The Inquisition is more popular than ever following Torquemada's public thwarting of an assassination attempt and Empress Celene's subsequent support. Our advisers tell us that Corypheus is officially on the defensive and we gather around the war table, trying to figure out what he might be doing in the Arbor Wilds, where he is believed to be hiding out with most of his army. Morrigan enters the war room uninvited and says we can stop trying to puzzle it out because she already knows. Rather than explaining it however, she tells Torquemada that it's easier to show her, and she leads us to a small chamber near our garden.

Morrigan reveals that she has brought an eluvian to Skyhold, a magic mirror used by ancient elves to travel across great distances. As a Dalish elf, Torquemada is fascinated and happily steps through the portal when Morrigan activates the eluvian. We find ourselves in a still, ethereal plane with other darkened mirrors nearby. Morrigan says only a few remain intact and free of corruption, and she believes one to be in the Arbor Wilds. Corypheus isn't interested in traveling, though. This plane is apparently "close" to the Fade and Corypheus would probably be able to accomplish his goal of assaulting the heavens from here. Now that Morrigan has made her point, we return to Skyhold to see about the attack plans.

"This realm has soothing blue lighting other than foreboding green lighting. Basically, it's the Fade with better feng shui."

Gathering our forces to attack Corypheus in the Arbor Wilds is going to require significant effort (40 power points) so there's time to engage in smaller operations while we muster our strength. Leliana says that her agents may have located the Hero of Ferelden, and we approve an operation to find him straight away. Unfortunately, Amastacia proves to be completely unreliable once again. He sends a letter saying he's looking for a way to solve the Grey Wardens' problem of "the Calling" once and for all. He's pretty sure the solution is at the bottom of this next bottle of Grey Warden conscription wine. He also sends along one of his old belts. The reason for this is unknown to Leliana or Torquemada, but from Amastacia's perspective it was incredibly helpful.

Prior to our appearance at Empress Celene's ball, we got a lead stating that Orlesian factions fighting in the Exalted Plains had stopped reporting in to their respective commanders. Now that the conflict between the Empress and the Duke has been resolved, those armies should have gone home. However, that hasn't happened, so Leliana and Cullen agree that we should investigate. Additionally, Cassandra wants to kill a rogue Templar, Dorian wants to kill a Venatori cultist and Vivienne wants to kill a snowy wyvern, all of which can be found in the Exalted Plains. So, we decide to do what we do best: make a camp in the wilderness and start killing everything around us.

Now, before I go too much further, I want to take a moment to talk about Dragon Age Inquisition's "creative interpretation" of what certain creatures look like. According to my trusty Dungeons & Dragons v3.5 Monster Manual, a wyvern is a large, flying reptilian beast with two wings, two legs and a long tail with a venomous stinger on the end. It's supposed to look like this:

Wyverns resemble dragons and although they're far less intelligent, they're still a threat to lower-level adventurers.

So, I was a little surprised to find out that in Dragon Age Inquisition, a wyvern is an iridescent, flightless, quadrupedal reptilian with no true wings and no tail stinger. It doesn't even remotely resemble a creature I'd describe as a wyvern:

This is just a mutant frilled lizard that's been playing with his mom's makeup.

Anyway, that's how I wound up fighting a high dragon in the Exalted Plains: by thinking it was the snowy wyvern that Vivienne wanted us to kill and not realizing her desired prey was the albino monitor lizard wandering through the marshes. However, since I haven't talked about the dragons in Dragon Age Inquisition so far, this provides a good opportunity to go into detail about what it's like to fight one in this game.

In Dragon Age: Origins, fighting a high dragon (whether it was the one outside the Temple of Sacred Ashes, Flemeth's shapeshifted form or the Archdemon itself) meant you had to watch your party's health closely and keep squishy rogues and mages out of range. In addition to being able to make effective attacks from any angle, Origins' high dragons could deal massive damage to even the best-armored warriors with a grapple attack that left them helpless. A well-placed fire breath attack in the direction of a mage can also turn the tide of battle against you in a matter of seconds. In summary, dragons had to be respected and handled with the appropriate amount of concentration, and defeating one felt like an accomplishment.

In Inquisition, however, dragons are lumbering meat slabs and fighting them is more about attrition than tactics. If you flank one, it will spend two seconds looking at you menacingly before delivering a telegraphed, easily avoidable kick in your direction. Their breath weapon is also preceded by a period of a couple seconds where the dragon inhales deeply and growls a Draconic phrase which translates to, "stand back! I'm charging my laser!" They hit hard, but not hard enough that you have to worry about keeping rogues or mages out of close range. This is especially true if you bring a mage that has invested points in the barrier spell. All you have to do is whittle down their massive health bars to zero before you run out of healing potions. Very little skill is necessary.

Vinsomer can be found on an island in the Storm Coast, after you beat up some Red Templars and steal their boat.

DAI Dragons don't deal well with being flanked... and Torquemada has gotten VERY good at flanking enemies.

The good thing about killing a dragon is the benefits for your Inquisitor, though. You get small quantities of dragon bone (which acts as metal for crafting purposes), dragon scales (acts as leather) and dragon webbing (acts as cloth), as well as any rare trinkets the dragon was hoarding. Your Inquisition also gains power and influence since being a dragonslayer gets you noticed even if an NPC didn't ask you to go out and kill it specifically. There are also at least ten dragon fights to be found in the game, so if you want multiple sets of dragon armor you can count on being able to find plenty of wyrms to harvest the materials from. This is definitely an improvement over Origins, where Wade made you choose between medium, heavy or massive armor and what he produced was the only set of dragon armor you'd find in the game.

Once again on the downside, however, some dragons are more rewarding than others. Torquemada killed the dragons in the Western Approach, the Exalted Plains and the Storm Coast but still didn't have enough dragon scales to make a set of tier 3 armor for herself. That situation changed drastically when she killed a frost dragon in Emprise du Lion though, and got 15 dragon scales from that wyrm alone. Now, I could understand this if greater rewards came from dragons that were actually harder to beat, but for the most part all the dragon battles are basically the same. In the case of this frost dragon, in fact, I found it to be inept compared to the lightning-breathing dragon in the Storm Coast. When the Storm Coast dragon was low on hit points, it used an ability similar to a stoneskin spell that gave it temporary armor to resist attacks. The Emprise du Lion dragon, on the other hand, would take flight to belch cold from above when it was low on health. It can only hit you if you stand perfectly still however, so eventually it will get bored, land, and allow itself to be thrashed.

These tarot cards represent our companions on the character select screen.

Helping Vivienne gives us one where... she spills wine on an old man?

Enough about dragons, though. Back to Vivienne and her poorly-explained bloodlust for genetically mutated lizard monsters. This is one of several quests that your companions give you once they like you enough and you have progressed far enough in the game. Vivienne doesn't explain why she wants the heart of a snowy wyvern but since we were going to kill it anyway along our path of destruction through the Exalted Plains, Torquemada respects her privacy and gives her the heart. She decides to open up to us when we're back at Skyhold, as she takes us to Orlais and the home of her husband, a nobleman by the name of Bastien. He is bedridden with some kind of illness and the heart is apparently a reagent for a potion, which she administers to her husband. Bastien wakes up, briefly, but only shares a final few seconds with Vivienne before dying. Torquemada awkwardly says she's sorry and we return to Skyhold.

Vivienne is clearly shaken by Bastien's death but she remains focused and says she must make sure that all the funeral arrangements are taken care of according to the demands of the Orlesian court. We get a large boost of approval from her simply by being there for her, though. As for our other companions, I've been completing their quests throughout the playthrough but haven't written about them yet since I've been focusing on the main storyline. Here are a few of the more memorable quests in brief:

I have some very rude things to say about "Blackwall" and the horse he rode in on.

After helping Blackwall recover some Grey Warden artifacts, he mysteriously disappears from Skyhold one day. Leliana tells us that he seemed disturbed by news of a pending execution in Val Royeaux. The connection is unclear, but we head to Val Royeaux to see if anyone there has run into him. Blackwall makes his presence known, however, as the execution is getting underway. The condemned man is a soldier who took part in a massacre but Blackwall says it's not the soldier's fault because he gave the order. He then reveals that he is not really the Grey Warden Blackwall, but an Orlesian army captain named Thom Rainier who commanded the troops responsible for the massacre. He fled from justice and was found in the countryside by the real Blackwall, who intended to conscript him into the Wardens. That never happened though, as Blackwall was killed in an ambush while Thom was traveling with him. Thom then decided to assume Blackwall's identity and perform noble deeds in the fallen Grey Warden's name.

Thom is taken into custody by Orlesian authorities, but Torquemada pulls some strings and has him transferred to Inquisition custody. He is then brought before her throne so she can pass judgement on him. Torquemada informs him that he dodged the Grey Warden right of conscription and stole a Warden's identity, so he will go to Weisshaupt to face their judgement as soon as Corypheus is dealt with. Until then, he will continue to serve the Inquisition. Thom claims he never wanted to deceive us but the fact is, he did. Several times. The guy is welcome to hang out in the stables and defend Skyhold in case Corypheus' forces decide to attack, but he can forget about being a party member from here on out.

Iron Bull is sad because he can't look intimidating while attacking people with a dainty, golden poleaxe.

One of our other warriors, Iron Bull, told us a while back that his contacts in the Ben-Hassrath informed him that the Qunari are concerned about Tevinter's new influence in the form of the Venatori alliance with Corypheus. As a result, there's a potential for an alliance between the Qunari and the Inquisition. To start, Iron Bull has arranged a meeting with another Ben-Hassrath operative who will meet us on the Storm Coast to take down a Venatori encampment they've found there. We proceed to the meeting site, and we're surprised to see that our Ben-Hassrath contact is an elf. He tells us that the Venatori have two lookout points that we need to take out simultaneously to prevent them from alerting their friends to an attack. Torquemada and her companions will hit the larger camp while Iron Bull will send his mercenaries, the Bull's Chargers, to take out the smaller one. Once we've done that, the Qunari will be sending in one of their dreadnought attack ships to assault the main Venatori forces. Iron Bull says he doesn't like covering for dreadnoughts because it's always risky, but we go forward with the plan.

Taking down the lookouts is the easy part. The scouts offer no serious resistance to Iron Bull's overpowering assault, especially with Torquemada sneaking around and stabbing them in the back at the same time. Looking to the other lookout site in the distance, we see that the Bull's Chargers took care of their target just as easily. Unfortunately, as we look down at the main Venatori encampment below, we see that a large group of mages have noticed the Chargers, too. The elven Ben-Hassrath tells us the Chargers need to hold that position and draw the mages' attention to keep them from attacking the dreadnought. Iron Bull knows that those mages will tear his company to pieces, though. The elf tells him that the dreadnought takes priority and if he orders the Chargers to retreat, he'll be declared Tal-Vashoth and his life with the Qunari will be over. Torquemada can tell that Iron Bull doesn't want to sacrifice his men. We tell him that we'll deal with Corypheus without a Qunari alliance, and he should have his Chargers retreat. As expected, the mages turn their attention on the dreadnought, which explodes and kills all the mages along with everyone on board the ship. Our elf contact is not happy, especially since he vouched for Iron Bull, and we part ways.

Leliana's card appears on the war table, and doesn't change when we help her.

Apparently, she's really committed to posing nude with her favorite raven.

Last but not least, we were approached by Leliana about a message that was delivered to her, which Divine Justinia had arranged to be sent to her in the event of her death. The letter says that Justinia has an item waiting for Leliana to be retrieved in a Chantry where she used to be a lay sister. Given the significance of the location and the lengths Justinia went to in order to have this message delivered, Leliana is certain that it's very important. So, we travel with her to the Chantry in question during the dead of night, only to find that there's someone there waiting for us. Leliana recognizes her as Sister Natalie, someone she knew from her Chantry life, and greets her warmly but she gives Torquemada a warning glance and slight shake of her head when Natalie's not looking. We continue to play nice though, and eventually find Justinia's hiding place. That's when Leliana's demeanor changes.

She draws a knife and holds it to Natalie's throat, and the sister admits she was sent here by an anti-Inquisition Grand Cleric. Torquemada tells Leliana we don't have to kill her but Leliana disagrees and slits Natalie's throat. She then opens the ornate box that Justinia left for her... only to find that it is empty, save for an inscription telling her to lay down her burden. Leliana incredulously says that Justinia was afraid that she was using her, and the message that the not-Justinia fade spirit gave us about failing Leliana reflected that fear that she was turning her into a weapon. Torquemada says that maybe Leliana should accept this message, but she scoffs and says she really is a ruthless person, and Justinia only freed her by proving that she never needed the Divine in the first place. Back at Skyhold, Leliana is back to planning assassinations and kidnappings with renewed gusto. Torquemada starts to think that maybe Leliana isn't the best choice to become the new Divine.

Vivienne summarized the Exalted Plains quite well, by describing it as a place where she's glad she didn't buy real estate.

As for the Exalted Plains, the region is similar to Emprise du Lion in the sense that it offers plenty of quests but they're all completely unrelated to the main storyline and not very interesting on their own merits. The region is full of Orlesian soldiers who didn't get the memo that said "war over" and Torquemada gets to deliver the bad news that the guy they were fighting for, Duke Gaspard, is the one who lost. Also, there are pits full of dead bodies being raised as undead that we have to set fire to, an accomplishment we celebrate by blowing nearby war horns. Corypheus may or may not be involved... it's unclear whether Venatori mages were raising the dead, or if they were just out in the Exalted Plains putting up "Vote for Corypheus" signs at the time. Either way, we kill them when we find them and we now have plenty of power points to track down his forces in the Arbor Wilds.

So, I didn't get much accomplished with this update, but we did learn a thing or two about the derpy dragons in this game! By virtue of defeating them, Torquemada has a new outfit that she'll show off when she attacks Corypheus in the near future. Unless, of course, Sera asks us to do her laundry for her and we get distracted by a new round of companion quests.