Dragon Age II Playthrough - Fancy Pajamas Unlocked

Chapter two opens with Cassandra and Varric discussing Hawke again, and the Inquisitor admits that the details are not what she expected. Hopefully sensing an opportunity, Varric says she can let him go if she's heard enough. Cassandra says she definitely wants the whole story now, so Varric tells her that the riches Hawke earned from the expedition were enough to get him a mansion in Hightown. Specifically, it's the Amell estate that Leandra grew up in, with its basement freshly cleaned of the bloodstains of the previous inhabitants, who were probably slavers but who cares if they weren't? Hawke has newfound influence too, and Varric's narration cuts to Chickene entering the keep at the request of the Viscount himself. The Qunari have continued to be a problem in Kirkwall and apparently, the Arishok has summoned Hawke by name regarding a matter that he will discuss with no one else, not even the Viscount. Chickene badgers the Viscount about compensation before politely agreeing to help.

Outside the keep, we are met by Bodahn Feddic, who is out of breath and bearing good news. The last of the profits from our expedition have come in, and we add a sizeable amount of gold to our already healthy coinpurse. At this point, we learn that Bodahn has decided to pay off his debt to Hawke by becoming his personal manservant, which we never really asked for or wanted... especially because it means his creepy son Sandal is living in the mansion, too. We immediately head to Hawke's new place, expecting there will be much damage to assess, but thankfully it's in pretty good shape. Chickene decides to change into a new outfit when we arrive as well, which the game calls "Finery" but we're pretty sure it's just an expensive set of sleepwear. We just hope this isn't our new armor, too. No one will take us seriously if we're magically blasting darkspawn in our PJ's.

The outfit looked way nicer on the mannequin in the store. It always does.

Thankfully, Chickene changes back into his mage robes before heading out to the docks with Aveline, Fenris and Varric. The Qunari have not gotten any friendlier in the past year, and the Arishok is no exception. When Hawke approaches, he says that someone has stolen a fake formula for their explosives and we should hunt them down. Chickene bluntly says that this doesn't concern him and goes to leave. It's at this point that the Arishok mentions that the formula is really for a deadly nerve gas and he suspects that if a certain dwarven merchant got hold of it, he wouldn't test its effects before mass producing it. We ask Varric where we can find Javaris, and our narrator just happens to have heard that the dwarf's assets are up for sale by the local crime syndicate, so they might have some ideas. With that, we're off to Darktown to get more information.

When we arrive, a conveniently loud Coterie representative is telling anyone in Darktown who will listen that she is selling Javaris' remaining properties. Chickene approaches her and demands to know where the dwarf is hiding. She doesn't appreciate our tone but since she wouldn't mind seeing him get roughed up, she points us toward a smuggler's tunnel that Javaris used to get out of Kirkwall. She also tells us to give him a kick or two for her as we head down the passage and are confronted by... Coterie thugs. I thought these guys wanted us to track down Javaris and rough him up for them?

Hawke is a guy who obliterates people with spirit magic first and asks questions later, so we annihilate the thugs and follow the passage to its exit on the Wounded Coast, where Javaris has set up an ambush using a large group of hired mercenaries. Just like the last mercenaries he hired, who couldn't hack their way through giant spider webs to save their lives, these guys are no match for Hawke and his allies. We approach Javaris, who says he should have known the elf bitch set him up and asks us to give him a quick death. There's just one problem: we didn't talk to any elf bitch.

That's not a bad idea, Javaris, but I left my favorite pike back at the mansion....

It turns out that Javaris didn't steal from the Qunari, but an elf extremist apparently did and is framing the dwarf for her crime. Chickene decides he's wasted enough time on the Wounded Coast and heads back to Kirkwall to find this elf. We don't have to go far, as we run into a guardsman blocking off a Lowtown slum that is being filled with poisonous gas. Aveline asks him for a report and he says that between the toxic fumes and the thugs attacking anyone who tries to stop them, the city guard is powerless to do much more than quarantine the area.

Chickene was about to ask if he really has to do this, but Aveline's icy death glare is the only answer he needs.

Naturally, it falls to Hawke to see how long he can hold his breath and seal the barrels of nerve gas. We do this by finding discarded valves laying on the ground and reuniting them with their barrel friends. All the while, a small army of mercenaries are dropping down from nearby buildings. This could have been a sequence that required close attention to detail on the part of Chickene, the party healer, but it's more an inconvenience than anything else... until the elf bitch shows up to find out who messed with her barrels.

She gives us a villain monologue about how the Qunari are abducting elves and Kirkwall's leaders are doing nothing about it. So, she decided to gas the slums with a Qunari weapon to make it look like the oxmen finally attacked. She then muses that she could really use a high-profile victim like Hawke to spark enough outrage and tells us the massacre will end with our deaths.

A smarter protagonist would have asked what she meant by "your people". But Chickene was tired of hearing her talk.

This fight is a bit more difficult, but the crazy elf with the greatsword didn't realize we brought our own elf with a greatsword. Ours has lyrium tattoos and more experience, and Fenris takes her down while Hawke, Aveline and Varric handle her cronies. The city guard rushes into the area-- after the fight is over, of course-- to thank us for saving what lives we could. Now all that's left is the unpleasant business of telling the Arishok and the Viscount.

We talk to the Arishok first, and politely inform him that people are trying to make the Qunari look bad. He grumbles about the lack of order in this city. Chickene gets grouchy too and asks the Qunari why they don't leave if they hate it so much. The Arishok finally admits that their line about "waiting for a ship" was a lie and they are not allowed to go home because they lost something. He ends our not-so-pleasant conversation by saying we should be grateful that it's not his job to fix Kirkwall.

We slowly come to the realization that by "fix Kirkwall", the Arishok doesn't mean the city's atrocious sewer system.

Hawke then goes to the viscount and fills him in on the details. Stating the obvious, Viscount Dumar says this is a bad sign because the Qunari had at least pretended to be cordial until now. He also says he has another problem: a couple of delegates sent by the Arishok have gone missing. Predictably, the viscount wants Hawke to be the one to find the delegates before word gets back to the Arishok. Before we get on that though, Aveline wants to see us in the barracks.

The new captain of the guard has asked us, in confidence, to deliver a secret package to one of her men, no questions asked. Clearly this is some kind of important, clandestine operation masterminded by our friend Aveline. This is the solid, tactical Fereldan thinking that won us the war against the darkspawn. Chickene is happy to deliver the package to Donnic, which turns out to be... a copper relief of marigolds. Ha! A CUNNING secret code!

"Forgive me, Serah Hawke, but I can't tell if that's optimism or just blind stupidity."

Varric, however, sees Aveline's reaction when we tell her the job is done and realizes she was trying to give a gift to a guy she has a crush on. So that's disappointing. Chickene grumps at her for not being more straightforward, before proceeding to accept every half-baked idea she and our companions come up with to fix the situation. First, Aveline gives him a cushy patrol, which Donnic thinks is a punishment. Then, Varric suggests they just get drunk together at the Hanged Man, but Aveline is too embarrassed to even meet him. Lastly, we decide they should go on patrol together while we scout ahead to make sure their patrol is a quiet one. Despite our proven track record of solving problems with violence, Aveline is unable to find a romantic topic of conversation while tiptoeing through the bodies of recently slain bandits.

Hawke and friends finally confront her at the end of her patrol and straight-up tell Donnic that Aveline is attracted to him. He awkwardly heads back to the barracks. Aveline is pissed. Later, at the barracks, she is trying to decide if she should try to head this off or just resign now. Before she can act, Donnic shows up and tells us he'd like to talk to Aveline alone in her office. She expects the worst, but the giggling coming from her office a short time later tells us that our convoluted mission has apparently been a success.

Ahh, the expressions of two lovebirds. Stoic, armored lovebirds.

So, you could say that chapter two is off to a rocky start. We partially thwarted a terrorist attack, but neither the Arishok or the Viscount are particularly happy about it. On the plus side, we helped the captain of the guard find romance and that might come in handy when the Qunari turn hostile and we need guardsmen to protect our new house. Our other companions are dropping hints that they want our help with their own personal affairs, though. I guess this is what happens when you're nice to people... 50% of the time, anyway....